maternity photo shoot with balloons

|| photography: roxana b photography ||

with this being my 4th pregnancy, i for sure thought i would be prepared for all the ups and downs that come during this season of life.  but with me having a baby right as i'm turning 30, this has definitely been my hardest pregnancy to date!  and i'm convinced it's because my body is saying goodbye to one decade and entering another.  haha!

with that being said, dave and i noticed early on that the romance in our relationship was definitely struggling.  and i don't just mean the sex. 

during the first month of my pregnancy, i became extremely nauseous, tired, achy, and emotional.  and none of it has gone away; leaving me physically, emotionally, and mentally drained most days and wanting to do nothing more than just lay in bed and be left alone.

because of this drastic change i was going through, the romance between dave and i began to dim.  luckily, we caught this marital shift early on, and were able to make some changes and work on keeping the romance alive during this pregnancy.

sure, we've had many hard and some down right nasty days during the past nine months.  but through it all, we've worked together, made sacrifices (dave more so than me), and focused on our relationship as much as possible.  because, when it comes down too it, if you aren't doing all that you can to keep the romance alive during pregnancy it will definitely take a toll on your marriage once the endless diaper changes, nighttime feedings, and all that other baby business consume your life.

i am definitely no expert on this topic.  and i know that each marriage and relationship is different.  but now that and i are almost 4 kids in to this parenting business, i do know what works best for us when it comes to keep the romance alive during pregnancy.   so i thought i would share.  

couples maternity photo shoot with balloons and pink wall

couples maternity photo shoot with balloons and pink wall

5 amazing tips to keep the romance alive during pregnancy

1) Focus on each others' love languages.

For me, i'm all about acts of service.  while dave is all about physical touch.  so dave works really hard on help out around the house and with our kids while i do my best at physically showing dave that i love and need him.  which has turned out to be very hard for me since i have been physically sick the good majority of this pregnancy; making it hard for me to be fully intimate with dave. so on the days that i'm sick, i make sure to do simple physical acts of affection like rubbing dave's back, holding his hand, giving him simple kisses, etc. etc. etc.  and on the days that i've felt good, i made it a top priority for dave and i to have sex.

2) Spend quality alone time together.

with me being constantly sick, and us already having three kids to look after,  this was something that was quickly overlooked in the first trimester of this pregnancy.  so when dave and i finally realized it had been months since we had been alone together.  we started making sure to spend alone time together at least once a week by either going out on dates, running simple errands together, or just hanging out on the couch when i was too sick to do anything else.

maternity photo shoot with balloons

maternity photo shoot ideas

3) Be patient.

pregnancy is super hard on both parents for very different reasons.  and is super easy to get caught up in your own personal struggles that come during this phase of life.  so make sure to remember that just like you, your spouse is struggling too.  and do all that you can to be patient with one another when things don't go they way you expected.

4) Communicate.

this is something that is important to focus on in any relationship.  but is an especially important thing to do during pregnancy.  even though i desperately wish that dave and i could read each others' minds; we cant.  so on the days when i am feeling sick, mentally incapable, or anything else in between.  i make sure to let dave know what's going, even if i think it is very obvious to see what i am currently going through.  then, i let dave know what i need from him to get through whatever it is i am currently dealing with.  and the same goes for dave.  during this pregnancy, there have been many times when he has had to be both the mom and the dad and he has often found himself with all of his eggs in one basket.  so, whenever he isn't able to get something done or can only focus on one particular thing he communicates that with me so i'm not left trying to figure out what's going on and why something hasn't been done.

maternity photo shoot with balloons

maternity photo shoot ideas

5) Don't worry, be happy.

pregnancy is such a hard thing for a couple to go through together.  but it is also one of the happiest of life's experiences too.  so even though there are many days when dave and i find ourselves wondering why we are having another kid; we do our best to push the doubts aside, laugh instead of cry, and focus on all the good that comes from growing our family.  doing these things doesn't make the pregnancy any easier, but it definitely helps keep things in perspective and us still liking each other at the end of the day :) .

and there you have it!

couples maternity photo shoot ideas

couples maternity photo shoot ideas

|| Dress: Tiffany Rose || Flower Belt: House L Beauty ||

pregnancy is such a hard thing for a couple to go through.  but it is also something that can bring you and your loved one closer together.  so if you are currently pregnant, hang in there!  and remember that if you remember to keep the romance alive during pregnancy it will make this time in your life that much more joyous and memorable.