What Motherhood has Taught Me

I am a Mother of three children. 

Since the very first time Dave and I talked about our future family, we both knew it would be rather big; consisting of 6 beautiful children that would be exactly two years apart.  Naturally, we thought it would be extremely easy for us to conceive children; so we were obviously very dumbfounded when we still weren't pregnant after trying for over a year.  Despite money being tight and having horrible insurance, we were determined to start our family.  After sitting down together and talking about all of our options, we decided to finish out the year by putting more money into our savings account, and continuing to try on our own.  Then, if we weren't pregnant by the beginning the new year, we would use the meager savings we had to pay for infertility treatments.

To our great surprise, by October 2009 we learned we were pregnant with our first child, Gus, and delivered him into the world on July 20, 2010.  11 months later, despite taking birth control, Dave and I found out we were pregnant with our daughter Birdie; and 3 months before Birdie turned two, we welcomed our 2nd son, Bug into our fast growing family.  Clearly, the blue print Dave and I had originally drawn up for our future family had somehow gotten lost in God's vast filing system; but it didn't matter, because we had been blessed with the ability to start our family and that's what mattered most.

I always think it's funny when each and every one us, at some point, get in our minds how life will work out; thinking that if we are completely prepared everything will go according to plan.  I guess that is the eternal optimist that makes up part of who we are.  Or, maybe that is just me.  Maybe the rest of you out there always have a plan B, C and D.  And to you, I tip my hat.  As some of you already know, I'm an Early Childhood/Elementary Educator by trade.  So, even with having my children less than 2 years apart, I thought motherhood would be an absolute breeze because I had 8 years of University and filed training under my belt; thinking it was an absolute waste of time to get further advice from anywhere else.

Boy was I wrong!

Like most future mothers, I thought to myself, "How hard could this motherhood business be?!  As long as I set boundaries, discipline when needed, and create a fun/loving environment, raising children should be fairly easy!"  However, just like a decades old bomb, children can be temperamental, hazardous, and at times, extremely detrimental; wreaking havoc on the physical, emotional, and mental well-being of their care-givers.   Sure, there are phenomenal strategies out there that teach you the proper ways to deal with colic, tantrums, and blatant defiance.  But, when you are sleep deprived and starved for a breather, all bets are off. 

 Never in a million years did I think I would have three children ages 3 and under in just over 3 years.  Nor did I ever envision...

* All three of my children getting up three or more times a night during their first year of life.

* My children getting so sick at times that  it would bring on heavy doses of emotional turmoil because all I wanted was for them to get better.

* Always being late to everything; because just when the kids and I are about to leave the house, some one poops out their diaper or empties the entire contents of a cereal box all over the floor. 

* Having various songs/movies on instant replay because that is the ONLY thing my children will watch or listen too.

* Never being clean.  Because in all honesty, once anyone becomes a mom, they somehow also became a personal hankie to every child they have.

* A daughter who cannot let a day go by without: 

Drinking water from the fish aquarium and/or toilet, taking off her soiled diaper and running around the house with remnants of poop still hanging from her butt, eating bugs/dirt/bandaids/sand/rocks/grass/flowers/soap/paper/crayons/chalk/ get the point, scaling up the stove and trying to turn on the burners while she's sitting on top of them, pulling off the outlet covers and trying to stick objects into the now exposed outlets, etc. etc. etc.

* Hearing my child say they hate me.

* Working hard to prepare meals/plan activities that my children end up wanting nothing to do with.


* Constantly feeling like I am always behind and never really in full control of my own life.

Four years ago, if you would have asked me how prepared I was to be mother, I would have said 100%.  However, if you were to ask me that today, my answer would be a lot different.  Before having children, I thought I had been given all the training I needed to be a mom.  But now that I find my self thick in the middle of it, I have learned that motherhood is one of those life occupations that keep you on your toes every step of the way.  It is a fluid and ever changing position that forces each woman to reach outside of herself, try new things, take chances, and get messy.  

During the countless instances when I thought I had finally conquered the challenges of motherhood, a curve ball situation always hits me straight in the face, sends me reeling into the air and eventually throws me flat on my butt; leaving me utterly dazed and completely confused about what in the heck just happened.  Needless to say, Motherhood is probably one of the most humbling experiences I will ever have.  So, instead of being ridiculously pompous and acting like I'm the sterling scholar of motherhood, I have learned that it's best to stay humble and continuously eager to learn.  Because let's face it, once your a mother, you're always a mother; and the journey is much easier when your standing on your own two feet than sitting at a standstill on your butt.

Loves and Hugs,